I hate that fucking “love” word. I hate how easily it feels the need to roll off of my tounge. I hate that it even wants to. This is not the time to be slipping up, Tounge.
Bees in the trap…
Today my manager asked me how I still don’t have a girlfriend and if it was because I was secretly an awful person. I donated $20 to a veteran outside shaws the other day so I don’t think I could really be that terrible. It really is a damn good question. This subject hurts my heart, but lately it’s been really getting to me.
My biggest fear in the world is getting a high five from a coyote and nobody believing me when I tell them about it.
I really don’t like it when girls say that I’m perfect, or charming, or sweet, or handsome, or wonderful, or lovely, etc. etc. because if I were those things I wouldn’t be so alone all the time and incapable of finding or maintaining love.
Gino, you’re great, but you’re going to live and die alone.
Out of pocket…
I have this quirk where whenever I donate money to something, be it dropping money in a box or even a guitar case, I have the strongest urge to drop in an absurdly large amount. Like ages ago when I was going to see fireworks with a girl that is now my ex. There was a guitarist playing where she worked and I liked his music, so on my way out I slipped a twenty dollar bill into his money basket and walked right out the door. About a week ago or so I went to go see a play. On the second night I decided I’d like to give something to the theater company because they really aren’t funded that much if at all by the school and I really do love the work they do and the shows they put on. I went up at the intermission and without even thinking that it may be a bit of overkill I dropped a fifty into the little pirate box.
My favorite thing about a large anonymous donation is when the recipient sees it afterwards I can just imagine the smile on their face. Like “Hole cow! This is a bundle!”. It’s not a lot compared to real money but donation wise I feel it’s really uplifting to receive something so generous.
I’m really just buying others happiness.
